Core Values #1 - Family and Friends

At 53 years of age, I have worked through the process of reviewing my core values, those things that are of great importance in defining who I am as a unique individual / child of God.

In other words, a core value is something you believe in so strongly, that you have, if you will, "carved it in stone and taken it to the bank."

I had not intended to write about my core values now. But something happened today that peaked my interest is putting some words into print.

Ken, our Senior Pastor, sent out and email to the rest of the clergy on staff, asking us to submit to him some phrase consisting of 8 words that would "preach." We are preparing for this Sunday for worship services using Jonah 3, the shortest chapter in the Bible.

I submitted the phrase, "Family and friends are what make me rich."

I would have submitted "Jesus love me this I know . . . "; however, one of the other clergy on staff here had already sent it in.

On Wednesdays in September and October, I teach a class on "Emotional Fitness" at noon and again at 6 PM. While teaching the noon class today, I realized that I was focusing somewhat on what I had sent Ken, and realizing that I had reaffirmed what is the #1 core value in my life.

Core Value #1 . . . It's all about relationships!

My relationships with God, family and friends are the most important thing in my life. Unfortunately, this was not my #1 core value for many of my adult years. My former #1 core value used to be, "the church is the most important thing, and I must sacrifice who and what I am and hope to be for the sake of the church."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Wrong answer. Thank you for playing.

It is not easy to admit that I have sacrificed so much, and so many people, on the altar of success in past years. My dear wife, my two daughters, too many friendships to count. My wife and daughters were kind, loving and Christian enough to give me a 2nd chance. A couple of my friends offered the same grace in kind.

It took time . . . a long time . . . and I had to identify and heal some past hurts in my life, to the point where I truly began to understand, not only in my belief and words but also in my actions, that what was truly most important to me in my life was my relationships.

In a word, relationships are "everything."

My relationship with God . . . when that is going well, my other relationships seem to also be going well.

When my relationship with God struggles . . . the same can be said for my other relationships.

My relationship with my wife and daughters changed the day I "woke up" and realized how much of a blessing they were to me . . . that they each were a "treasure" to be cherished, loved, protected and honored. My wife, daughers, and their husbands, are worthy of my intentional time and prayers.

The time I came to embrace this was about the time I came up with the saying "family and friends are what make me rich." I only found out a few years ago that various authors and poets have claim on that phrase.

I don't care.

I may not own it, but I own the emotions attached to it.

Life is truly the sum (the answer to an addition problem) of our relationships, and the time we spend in each of them.

Core Value #1 - relationships are everything, especially my relationship with God, family and friends!

God's grace still amazes me . . . ><>